'They stole my boss's wallet on camera': 20+ Employees who got fired as fast as possible

Author image for Remy Millisky
Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Jul 21, 2023 3:00 PM EDT

Getting a new coworker at your job is always interesting. Some people you immediately click with, others you don't, but either way, you're going to get to know them as you begin to work together. Unless you're these folks, that is. 

These employees shared stories of their coworkers who got fired as fast as possible, and in some cases, before they could even get their hiring paperwork filed. That's truly impressive! And it doesn't even seem to be that uncommon. 

You learn this is especially true for lower-paying jobs, like food service and retail, where people bounce between jobs all the time. For example, I once knew a guy who kept getting hired and fired at the same food establishment that we both worked at. He got fired for a bunch of reasons, such as being a no-call-no-show or getting into screaming matches with managers over when to change out food products (you know, the thing that food safety standards require. It's not like managers were doing that for fun, it was so customers wouldn't eat musty old burger patties. It was an odd hill for him to die on.)

Why did he keep getting rehired? Well, he kept hanging out in the lobby of our establishment. All day long, he'd "order food," and by that I mean that he'd pretend to order food from his GF, who was also an employee. He'd stand there talking to her while other employees did her job! He'd bug everyone and their mother for free drinks, which we gave him, and then would ask for free milkshakes and food, which we weren't allowed to give him. He was never satisfied! And if management kicked him out, he'd go to the parking lot and play music in his car so loudly that we couldn't hear the drive-thru speakers.

It was so frustrating and bewildering for everyone involved that management just kept hiring him back, because then at least he could talk to his GF while they both worked. If you can't beat them, have them join you in the kitchen, I suppose?

These folks below shared their funniest stories of coworkers who got the boot as fast as possible. Up next, this boss told her nanny to miss her sister's wedding so that she could babysit. 

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  • 01
    Human body - What is the fastest you have ever seen a new co- worker get fired?
    via u/bartertownb*er
  • 02
    Rectangle - 123abdce During their onboarding training, they stole my bosses wallet on camera.... 1 hour in..
    via u/123abdce
  • 03
    Font - ninetiesluddite S This is the opposite route here but I found it amusing. My boss was out of town and I managed a tea shop near a Starbucks years ago. This kid came in (foreign) and said he was supposed to start today. We were hiring and I trained him etc. My boss came back two days later and had no idea. The kid was in the wrong place but he stayed with us. Hired on the spot without even applying.
    via u/ninetiesluddite
  • 04
    Font - 01 fast_hand84 Ⓒ New guy drove a forklift into a fire hydrant, in front of a safety rep for the company. His supervisor was called over, and he immediately tells the supervisor that he won't pass a p test, as he used his only bottle of clean p earlier that day when he hired in. Everybody standing there immediately burst into laughter, which continued as security (also laughing) escorted him off site. Even the supervisor was all smiles...just gave him a pat on the back and wished him the b
    via u/fast_hand84
  • 05
    Font - [deleted] 2 2 S 3 Heard this from a manager I worked with when I worked in fast food. There was this one kid who didn't show up for work. He ditched work often, so the manager called around, couldn't get anyone to fill in his shift, so she had to fill it for him. A few hours into his shift, the dude ditching SHOWS UP, with his friends, and orders food from that manager. She fired him on the spot.
    via u/deleted
  • 06
    Font - NinthReever S2 First day of work, he walks in, says "what the f is up dumba" to the guy that parked next to (didn't touch) his new Camaro he bought since he got hired. The guy was the CEO of the company I used to work for, on visit to our branch. Literally ten minutes into his shift he was signing release papers.
    via u/NinthReever
  • 07
    Font - CBus-Eagle We had a recent college grad that would use his corporate card for personal purchases. He figured that the company would just keep deducting from his payroll until it was paid off. He was fired after three months of constant reminders to stop doing it. I don't think it qualifies as the fastest, because he lasted three months, but it was so idiotic.
    via u/CBus-Eagle
  • 08
    Font - Dendad1218 4 & 2 More I work construction. We had 2 new hires that were friends starting the same day. Boss told one take a coffee order and come back. Took everyone's money and said he needed his friend to go with him cause it was a big order. They never came back. 28.9k Share
    via u/Dendad1218
  • 09
    Font - Insectshelf3 22 guy got hired, while going through orientation realized that his ex gf worked there too, turned around and walked right out the front door.
    via u/Insectshelf3
  • 10
    Font - PunchBeard I got hired as a long- term temp with one other person to do some basic data entry work at a major brand pretty much everyone has heard of. And it was at their corporate headquarters so pretty prestigious. Anyway, we went through all of this onboarding stuff in the morning that required us to get photo IDs and figure out parking and all that stuff. Then after 2 or 3 hours we were introduced to one of the employees in our new department who began going over what we were going to
    via u/PunchBeard
  • 11
    Font - None of it seemed overly difficult and I figured that while it was new system I had never used before I'd be able to work it out in a few days as long as I asked questions and took notes. And that was the thing that made me realize that the other person who got hired with me probably lied on her resume and was completely out of her depth. She didn't take any notes and didn't ask any questions. And whenever I glanced at her I could see flashes of panic on her face. Well,
    via u/PunchBeard
  • 12
    Font - lunchtime came and when we came back she said that another company had called her and offered her a permanent position and she couldn't work with us ay longer. Both me and the person training us knew what was going on but I'll give the other lady credit for finding a way out without losing face too badly. The takeaway here is: Yes, "Fake it Until You Make it" can and does work. But you gotta' be able to fake it. You can't fake faking it.
    via u/PunchBeard
  • 13
    Font - wanderin_fool 2 S A 19 year old kid got hired to work the seafood counter. See him twice and then never again. Asked a coworker what happened. He had closed seafood one night and was walking out of the store and the 5 pounds of crab legs he'd stuffed down the back of his pants fell out in front of the closing manager.
    via u/wanderin_fool
  • 14
    Font - KnightofShaftsbury. (S) New guy started on Monday and was gone by Friday. The guy hit some racking in the warehouse with the forklift, boss saw him do it, and the guy decided to lie about it when asked if he knew what happened.
    via u/KnightofShaftsbury
  • 15
    Font - pdxchris Couldn't pass the simple tests given at the end of new hire orientation. Yelled at test facilitator when she wouldn't just take the test for him.
    via u/pdxchris
  • 16
    Font - UltimaCaitSith The IT crew at a large government office worked on a ticket system, meaning that the government workers submitted their problem online and one of the IT guys would pick it up on their end. The new guy just started his first day, logged into a computer at an empty office, and submitted a "reinstall entire OS" request so he could spend all day there. The manager decided to check in on him before lunch to see how he was doing, and he was completely asleep. Fired before they ev
    via u/UltimaCaitSith
  • 17
    Font - Davran 3 Spent my summers in college working as a laborer for a construction company. Anyway, we were doing a bunch of renovation in an active hospital, so noise and dust were a huge concern. We were a small crew and just starting renovations on an area with a super tight schedule, so the company hired a subcontractor for some of the work. Enter these two clowns who show up to do some demolition work. Foreman gives them the talk about how they may be used to doing things a certain way, bu
    via u/Davran
  • 18
    Font - rather the work take longer than for them to make a huge mess or a lot of noise. An hour later, we apparently got multiple complaints about the noise and the mess, so the foreman calls me up and says to go over there and clean up NOW, and that he'd be by shortly to see what the h was going on. These dudes had dust and broken wall everywhere. I could hear them half way down the hall, just smashing away without a care in the world. The foreman shows up and we walk into the room to witness t
    via u/Davran
  • 19
    Font - the rest of this wall is still hanging from the ceiling, I have no idea how. Guy wasn't even wearing a hard hat, apparently oblivious that at any moment that wall might give way and crush him. The foreman lost his fing mind on these guys. Kicked them out immediately, and got on the phone with their company and told them he didn't want to see these guys on site again. Lots of choice four letter words were used, even threatened to fire the subcontractor entirely and get someone else to do t
    via u/Davran
  • 20
    Font - PresidentStone Coworker quit his job, great job, great pay, great benefits to work in a radio repair place. I mean, gotta do what you love and he was also a big radio enthusiast. Got fired the first day on the job for stealing parts for his own radios at home. Took him over a year to get back with us. Surprised they rehired him. He then got fired for being a security risk about a year or so later.
    via u/PresidentStone
  • 21
    Font - Ultimate A hole S Where to begin. One person didn't show up for their second day citing culture shock and then spent at least an hour each day complaining about everything to HR. They were gone inside of a month. Some other bloke refused to follow processes and called his manager "an irrelevant woman" in team meetings. Gone within a week.
    via u/UltimateAr**hole
  • 22
    Font - My "favourite" was technically a new coworker from my perspective only as I'd only just become aware of their existence. They interpreted "we're going to retire that server from production" as "we're going to throw the hardware off of the roof into a skip" and proceeded to head down to the data centre, power the thing off in the middle of the day, drive to his friend's office, plug the box in and deploy a bunch of IVR scripts he'd derived from our proprietary scripts so they could run a b
    via u/UltimateAr**hole
  • 23
    Smile - jbiggs107 5 days. My boss hired an "Executive Chef".. dude didn't even know how to make a quesadilla...
    via u/jbiggs107
  • 24
    Font - lost_access S New director starts, at lunchtime goes to cafeteria, pays for the first salad plate (by weight), then goes back twice for refills without paying. Cafeteria has cameras, cafeteria manager talks to the Partner in charge. New Director fired before the end of day.
    via u/lost_access
  • 25
    Font - jeff_the_nurse 23 & 2 More As a teenager, I worked at a bowling alley. Within an hour, a new girl was fired on the spot for dropping a ball on the foot of a complaining patron.
    via u/jeff_the_nurse
  • 26
    Font - Obsolescencee A man was hired to do stock at a tea store that sold lots of delicate China. Manager walked into the back on his like third day and saw him just throwing boxes of tea cups and teapots. Instantly fired.
    via u/Obsolescencee
  • 27
    Cheezburger Image 9788307712
    via u/datacollect_ct
  • 28
    Cheezburger Image 9788307968
    via u/Ed_Rock

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